Camera Obscura - Knox Geek Alert; 'Battlestar" Ends

Geek Alert!!

Fans of comics, sci-fi movies and TV shows and even 'rasslin (?) will be all over the Knoxville Convention Center starting today and continuing this weekend as they host Adventurecon. One name that caught my attention was Irvin Kershner, who directed The Empire Strikes Back, and of course a host of Star Wars celebs, like Anthony Daniels (C3PO), Peter Mayhew (Chewbacca) and the guy in the Vader suit for the first three movies, David Prowse. (David was also in A Clockwork Orange, too). Also set to attend is actor Billy Dee Williams.

Another name I immediately noticed was Caroline Munro, a Hammer horror gal who was in one of my favorite old horror movies, Captain Kronos, Vampire Hunter. Of course she was a Bond girl, starred in the very odd "Starcrash" and in "Golden Voyage of Sinbad" and many more genre flicks.

From Star Trek, there's Walter Koenig and Denise Crosby. A full list of celebs is here at the Adventurecon site. Comic artist John Romita Jr, and many more newer artists and writers are also scheduled to appear. Plus tons of dealer tables and lots and lots of new toys!!! (Oh, I mean "Collectibles")

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Since I'm here in cult film fans and geeks, allow me to point you to the first preview of the new Star Wars show, The Clone Wars. (At this time, no network has signed on to air the show ... maybe a direct-to-DVD release??)

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Director Darren Aronofsky's science fiction movie from 2006, "The Fountain" is out on DVD and I saw it last week. It stars Hugh Jackman and Rachel Weisz as a couple whose love story is charted over a thousand year time frame via three parallel stories from the past, the present and the future.

Praise for this movie has been quite large, but I have to say that although I did enjoy the movie, it all kind of fell flat for me. The movie does have much to recommend it for viewing, though for me what most viewers saw as the 'future' time-frame set in a weird bubble-like spaceship I interpreted completely differently, as more of a spiritual landscape of two loving souls searching for each other over time and space.

Acting and effects are all excellent - it just sort of seemed like it needed one more script revision to express itself better. I would say this is one of those movies that a viewer will either simply love or truly hate and find boring. I'm more in the middle - call it an Good Try Which Fails.

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Makers of the highly acclaimed "Battlestar Galactica" series have announced the upcoming fourth season will be the last for the show:

"This show was always meant to have a beginning, a middle and, finally, an end,” read a statement issued by executive producers Ronald Moore and David Eick. “We’ve decided to … conclude the show on our own terms."

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And a favorite mash-up video for you: Ron Burgundy as the King of Sparta!

Turn All The Web Into LOLCats

Goofiness is one of my close friends. So what follows on this post is me letting that friend take over a post here.

Via an entry on Metafilter, one intrepid web walker devised a page which can convert any RSS feed, Facebook, Twitter, news feed, CraigsList personals, and just about any page on the web into goofy pictures of cats to go with the headlines on post entries. I had much laughter doing that. The following picture was from one of my entries this week:

Oddly, when I popped in the Instapundit address, all I got was the constant repetition of this picture, with no headlines. Guess this is just InstaCats, hard at work.

Go here if you wish to play the game.

2008 Primaries In 2007

The race for the 2008 Presidential election, as if ya didn't know, is underway NOW. Why is it here 16 months before the actual November election day?

It's because the nominees of the current two party system will be locked into place within the next 7 to 8 months. Yesterday the state of Georgia moved their primary date to Feb. 5th, the same as Tennessee, Alabama, Arkansas, California. Delaware, Idaho, Michigan, Missouri, New Jersey, New Mexico, New York , Oklahoma and Utah. Even earlier, on Jan. 29th, primaries are to be held in Florida and South Carolina and before then, election primaries will be held in Iowa, Nevada and New Hampshire. Even more changes are ahead as another 12 state legislatures have pending bills to move their primaries - which means nearly 40 states would have their primaries by Feb 5th.

The candidates who win primaries then - about 8 months from now - will be the two who battle it out between February and November. So the campaign is in full tilt mode today. And I think John H. pegged another reason for the push "most of America is ready to get rid of the current bunch."

Given the more immediate nature of media today, with instant news and instant web reports, a candidate with deep pockets of quick cash could easily wait until December to announce and still gain the edge by February. In fact, the less time a candidate has to endure the daily grind of media and public grilling, the better their chances. And given the current timeline of primaries, it will be that grind over the next 7 months which will lead to the two nominees. And all the smart money today, approaching the first of June, says the race is wide open and anyone of the announced and unannounced candidates could be their party's winner. That has to churn the insides of campaign organizers and candidates.

This summer and early fall will make or break a campaign.

That's why the debates are taking place now and the heat of summer has not yet begun, and it will be getting hotter than seven hells for all of the Seekers for the next seven months. The web will roil with riotous upheaval -- and I think there's a reason for that too: no candidate or party has a really solid idea on what to do next to resolve the issues of the Bush administration, though all of the voters know there is a hell of a mess to clean up.

Horace Silver Quintet

While I often link to videos at YouTube (as I did yesterday) that might have some political statement, I have found most often I go the site to watch a vast collection of musicians often captured live onstage. Some web users have patiently and diligently brought out many incredible performances. From Miles Davis to Stan Getz or Thelonious Monk, Sonny Rollins, Bill Evans and many others I could name, there is a galaxy of musical genius to witness. (As opposed to watching say, the blunders of politics or just average folks yakking at a webcam.)

Tonight as dusk was approaching I was driving thru town and listening to the Horace Silver Quintet play "Senor Blues". Something about that jazzy, bebop sound and summer nights can coalesce into amazing moments. So, web junkie that I've become, I searched YouTube for some Horace Silver performances and found this incredible performance before a Dutch crowd in 1959. I also highly recommend Horace's official web site - much history and inspiration about the legendary performer can be found there.

Ladies and Gentlemen, The Acting Candidate

When a politician comes out in a coyish, alluring way to announce maybe he'd like to run for and become the President of the US of A, I immediately distrust them. Either on the bus or off, as Ken Kesey used to say.

The coyish-candidate is Fred Thompson. He's a good actor. So is he acting like he's being coy or is he really being coy? He certainly acts patriotic in a video released in 2003. In response to his video, is this one:



The Fred-wooers and war-lovers are up in arms by Kleinheider's post about the above video.

My only complaint about that video is it needs to include reference to other soldiers, not just the American military. While I absolutely respect a person's decision to serve in the military, there are other ways to defend and fight for freedom, democracy and human rights. You, dear reader, know this and if you do not, it's time to re-evaluate your worldview.

It's comforting to think our military presence in Iraq is made of patriotic volunteers and no doubt there are many, many of such folk. There are also over 126,000 highly paid members of privately contracted "security forces" at work in Iraq too, funded by our tax dollars. And the more than half a million soldiers are still not enough to achieve whatever definition of success the current administration in Washington is seeking.

But for Fred to wax sentimental (act sentimental?) in his courtship with the presidency is rather hollow. Denigrating other groups, like students or reporters, is too much of a repetition of the currently divisive nature of Washington politics. If that's Fred's take on America, I hope he stays on the sidelines. Being dramatic is easy work. Tackling the issues and shaping the policies both at home and around the world is much more difficult and complex.

UPDATE: Radio talker Steve Gill rips angrily at both Kleinheider and Brittney for daring to even consider posting the Thomspson video. How dare K and B express an opinion??!! Especially on the internet!! Especially about a non-announced candidate for president!?!?!? Gill sets his Blamethrower to full power, which is the mundane status quo of talk radio (is it time to start calling these shows Hate Radio?)

So You Think You're a Star Wars Fan?

30 years, six movies, a gajillion product tie-ins and fan conventions which seem to occur every few seconds at some place on the globe -- all that has made George Lucas' "Star Wars" a bona-fide legend (and made Lucas one rich man). Memories of the first film (now known as Episode IV) have been abundant this weekend as fans mark the anniversary of the release of the original film.

I have my own personal memory. It started on a summer night in Newport, TN when some friends and I went to watch a movie at the Woodzo Drive-In. I can't recall what movie we went to see, but I vividly recall seeing the preview for "Star Wars." First, though, a little background. Way back then, the Woodzo was adjacent to another drive-in, called Scenic Drive-In. That drive-in exclusively showed soft-core porn - which was a little odd in that the screen actually faced the highway, so anyone driving past might catch a glimpse of a 40-foot close-up of a boob or butt check or even more.

Anyway, on that night, my friends and I were scooting across the fence between the Woodzo and the Scenic to watch some movie with naked girls. However, just before I scooted across, I happened to hear and see the first images of "Star Wars." The announcer was talking about aliens from 1,000 worlds and spaceships firing off lasers and robots talking and walking around and that preview just froze me to the spot. For the first time in my young life, thoughts of naked women became a secondary issue.

I was friends with the owner of the Woodzo, so I immediately went into the projection booth to talk to him about the preview he had just shown:

"Harold, what was that movie?"

"It's called The Star Wars," he said.

"When will you show it?? I have to see it!"

"Well, not fer a while. All the hard-top theatres will get it first, but it'll come here later this summer." (NOTE: hard-top theatre is an indoor theatre.)

By the time it did arrive at the Woodzo, I had already seen it in a hard-top theatre, which was a good thing, since it was nearly impossible to get to the Woodzo in time for a parking spot for their showings as the movie was a monster hit by then. And yes, I was one of those legions of folks who saw the movie about 40 times during it's first release.

Still, I often ponder if it was the movie or the marketing for it which made it such an icon of entertainment. The marketing continues full tilt to this day. As the photo above shows how folks today can order Star Wars Halloween costumes for their pets.

Back in the early days, you could even buy your little girl Star Wars Underoos. Insects now have scientific names based on Star Wars' character names.

The inter-web, of course, is loaded with collectibles, parodies, jokes, essays and more - there is a four-page collection of links here at Look At This (such as the rock band that wears Star Wars costumes and is named AeroSith) and the Star Wars related theme posts on MetaFilter is likewise a huge list of links.

One odd bit of movie trivia I learned from watching the movie and it's sequels so much was the inclusion of a sound effect scream, known as The Wilhelm Scream, The scream is in all the Star Wars movies, but dates back to the early 1950s and is still being used today, in movies like "Reservoir Dogs", "Spiderman", and "Shrek the Third". A full list of the movies with the scream is here, and the history of the scream here. Whose voice made the scream? Best bets say Sheb Wooley.

So these days, I divide the fan loyalty (or madness) into two groups: those who know about the Wilhelm Scream connection and those who don't.

RELATED: Some other remembrances are here from Kat at NiT.

Music For A Long Summer Weekend

Camera Obscura - True Obscurity; Bloody Rambo; Movie News;Sanjaya Hoax

One legend in Hollywood lore is that an actor/actress who wins an Oscar follows the win with a role so strange in a movie so odd that it could scramble a viewers' brain. Some examples are Michael Caine's appearance in "Jaws IV" after winning one or Halle Berry's role in "Catwoman" following her win for "Monster's Ball."

But these all pale in comparison to the movie "Shadowboxer" with Helen Mirren, released just prior to her win in "The Queen." (NOTE: The director of "Shadowboxer", Lee Daniels, was recently in Tennessee, making the movie, called "Tennessee" which features Mariah Carey.)

Now I really love Mirren's work - she can plan darn near any part and bring something fantastic to the screen. But "Shadowboxer" is a movie that could kill a career, turn your brain upside down, and is nearly impossible to explain - just as it is nearly unwatchable. A viewing of the movie from start to finish should earn the viewer some kind of Endurance Oscar.

It's oddity and strangeness did compel me to watch it all, as I kept wondering just how strange it could become and with each passing scene it exceeded my expectations. Strange was just the beginning point of this odyssey into the bizarre. The cast includes some other notables, and more on that in a minute. First, let me try and lay down the schematic here.

It opens with a young boy toying with a real gun. Dad enters and warns him said gun is no toy. Mom looks on fearfully. Fast forward to the future and young boy is now a grown man, played by Cuba Gooding Jr (yet another Oscar winner who just can't seem to connect to good movies at all anymore). Gooding now enacts odd criminal plots with Helen Mirren, who, we learn as the movie continues via moody montages and artsy flashbacks, is both his step-mother and lover and teacher.

What is she teaching him? How to be a hitman. Seems Mirren is a top-tier hirtman. They share weird assignments and then she bathes Gooding when he's feeling low. Just one of many scenes which leave the viewer .... well, confused barely describes it.

Oh, and we also learn Mirren is dying of cancer. It's like some weird blend of a Lifetime movie and a Steven Segal script or something.

The daring couple get a contract to kill some other crooks who have angered their crook-boss, played by Stephen Dorff. Like Gooding, Dorff seems to have a knack for finding the strangest of scripts. In addition, the contract calls for the killing of Dorff's girlfriend, who is pregnant. (The girlfriend is played by actress, Vanessa Ferlito who had a short but excellent performance in the "Death Proof" portion of "Grindhouse", and in "Descent", and I hope she continues to find better films.)

As the crooks are killed off one-by-one, Mirren walks in on said pregnant gal and just as Mirren takes aim at her, the gal's water breaks and Mirren decides to help birth the child -- "Get some water and towels!" she tells her confused partner/step-son/lover Gooding.

Not to give too much of the plot and story away (yeah, like anyone other than me would watch this from start to finish) Mirren and Gooding take the mother and child to a new home with new identities and only take occasional hit-jobs to keep the family financially well off. "You take care of her!" Mirren says of their semi-adopted young woman, and then there's a scene where Gooding and Mirren get naked and do the nasty in a public park while blossoms and such flutter artfully in the breeze and Gooding then shoots Mirren in, I suppose, an act of mercy to avoid a painful death by cancer.

Other casting oddities here are Joseph Gordon-Levitt ("Brick", "The Lookout"), who plays a doctor to the criminal underworld and his girlfriend is hilariously played by Mo'Nique.

This movie almost falls into the neo-exploitation genre of movies like "Hustle and Flow" and "Black Snake Moan." And it absolutely qualifies as Obscure Find of the Month.

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OTHER MOVIE NEWS

Quentin Tarantino showed an expanded full length version of "Death Proof", from the "Grindhouse" double feature at the Cannes Festival this week. Judging from reports, producer Harvey Weinstein says the full version is better.

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Reviews are in for the new Coen brothers feature, "No Country For Old Men" by Cormac McCarthy and the reviews are solid. I look forward to this one big time:

"Cinematographer Roger Deakins captures everything from mid-day open-sky vistas to claustrophobic night time urban action; in timing and tension, No Country for Old Men is one of the most suspenseful films the Coens have ever made, which says a lot. Cormack McCarthy's novel has also been impressively well-adapted -- improved and altered, but nonetheless full of McCarthy's clear, concise yet poetic voice."

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Looks like the FOX network will try another sci-fi series. This time, it's a spin-off from "The Terminator" series called "The Sarah Connor Chronicles." A nifty preview reel was on YouTube earlier this week but got taken down. Sarah Connor will be played by Lena Headey ("300", "Brothers Grimm") and yes I have a crush on her. A future cyborg sent back to help the Connor family is played by Summer Glau, who was River in the series "Firefly." Sadly, given FOX's track record for sci-fi, this show will air four episodes and then be cancelled.

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A preview which has been left on YouTube this week is for the movie "Rambo 4". Jeez, does Stallone look rough and old and rather ill. The preview also boasts buckets of gore and violence, especially the shot of a guy getting turned to hamburger meat while sitting in a jeep.Reports say they are fighting hard to keep it from being rated NC-17. And his co-star is the lovely Julie Benz, who was Darla in "Buffy The Vampire Slayer" TV show.

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Clip of the week -- Was Sanjaya of "American Idol" a Joke??? Or is the whole dang show a joke at the expense of music itself ....

Porn, Politics and the Internets

I have to share a discovery I made this week. I suppose it should not be surprising news to some, but it perplexes me.

Early this week, I mentioned the erotic encounter reported by Knoxville porn starlet Barbie Cummings and a member of the Tennessee Highway Patrol. The report was just too dang odd and inherently funny not to mention. Since then, this humble blog has been swamped at historical levels as readers sought details of the encounter. Visitors from every state and all US territories, from China, Europe, Africa, Australia, Asia, South America, and the UK all feverishly arrived here looking for info. I'm pretty sure if web access were available to penguins and polar bears, this blog would have crashed my server.

It's isn't news that there is porn and more porn in every corner of the internet. And I have pondered the ramifications of renaming this page Cup of Joe Porn just to drive traffic here, but I won't do that .... really, I won't.

And make no mistake, I am delighted that the abundance of visitors found this humble and lovable blog. But it is slightly disappointing that bajillions of people place a higher need on finding porn than on any other topic previously posted here. (It is worth noting too that the previous record holding post on these pages was the link to a page that features submissions of pictures of cats that look like Hitler. An insatiable desire to find Hitleresque cat pics and porn doesn't exactly boost my overall optimism in web-aware humans. It makes me wonder if there is some nefarious site of Hitler Porn which gathers billions of readers.)

And hey, if pixels of porn fill your personal needs, I hope at least such binary urges harm no one. And if only a teeny percentage of such web-walkers land here and decide to read some other posts available here or link to the sites I offer, then I am grateful for that, at least.

What I have learned does indeed add to my understanding of one peculiarity. Namely, how it is a U.S. President can be relentlessly excoriated, vilified and become an obsessive focus of humanity when linked to an episode of Oval Office erotic encounters -- as opposed to a US President who has distorted the Constitution, consistently and deliberately mislead the public and the Congress in national and international affairs, appointed incompetent leaders to jobs in emergency management and other vital offices, embrace secret prisons and generally ignore realities by the truckload. It appears such acts are just too boring and fleshy games of slap and tickle in the White House need little understanding by base minds.

It's as if the public expects a preponderance of corruption of power and blindly accept it as normal. Make the lie large enough and few will care. And scandal now is the domain of the mundane expletive or celebrity haircut.

Cable Bill Removed From Legislature, For Now

Reports say this morning that the bill to alter the laws regarding cable franchises in Tennessee has been withdrawn by it's sponsor. R. Neal has a good round-up of coverage on this action.

I hate to admit it, but I think it's a pipe dream to imagine the massive public opposition, along with the firm opposition from city and county governments statewide were the cause of this removal. I do think such opposition helped. The plan will be back next session, I am sure.

To me, that indicates the lobbying efforts from AT&T will fade from the front pages of media and blogs and will now become an assault on individual members of the General Assembly - in other words, they are going to try this again after they can harass members in private. That will also mean the company will be spending big bucks to inundate the residents of Tennessee with propaganda promoting their plan.

The fact remains, under current law, AT&T could, if they wanted, apply to cities and counties for franchise rights. The current law does not prevent them from seeking to become legal providers. The real question for residents and legislative members is why AT&T does not do so.

See also previous posts.

Creation of New State Agency Behind OK of Cable Bill?

A new law which takes the cable TV business away from local controls and local voices sailed out of the Tennessee Senate Committee yesterday and looks to be headed to a vote by the full legislature - which, I expect means it will be adopted and made law.

As I've written before, I have no opposition to AT&T wanting to jump into the cable business - but to make that decision only after state law is altered, only after local control of cable franchises has been removed, provides no benefit to the consumer and muddles the procedures for how such franchises would be held accountable.

Yesterday I mentioned some of the reasons the Senate Committee chaired by East Tennessee Republican Steve Southerland gave in to the pressures of the high-dollar lobbying by AT&T. Senator Southerland, along with Sens. Beavers, Bunch, Crutchfield, Stanley and Wilder. Voting no were Sens. Burchett, Burks and Tate.

A plan which would have allowed for the Tennessee Regulatory Committee to provide oversight of the requirements of the now all-but-approved changes to law was scrapped and instead and entirely new state organization will be created to "oversee" the law.

The new group (no mention of it's operational costs and impact on the state budget) will be made up of twelve members nominated by the Tennessee Municipal League (which had opposed the legislation) and the Tennessee County Services Association (despite that counties statewide voted to oppose the bill), and by the State Comptroller, the commissioner of the Dept. of Economic and Community Development, and the chairman of the TRA.

Just fascinating how opposition to the bill was transformed once some of those opposing it would now be part of a creating the special government committee.

In Tom Humphrey's report today in the Knoxville News Sentinel, he has this marvelous quote from AT&T president in Tennessee, Marty Dickens:

"the Senate committee's vote demonstrates the legislators are listening to consumers"

I have heard precious few "consumers" advocate this bill. Highly paid lobbyists have been vocal, though, spending millions to push this bill.

And as Humphrey writes, opposition to the bill from Sen. Tim Burchett prompted AT&T to warn him that his opposition would cost him campaign contributions. AT&T attorney Joelle Phillips said nothing inappropriate was done, though, and that her company backs "less government, lower taxes and more freedom."

True, if you think adding a new level of state bureaucracy is "less government". The cost to the budget, unknown. Cost to taxpayers, unknown. Benefits for AT&T - large.

The bill may be voted on in the full legislature Thursday.

NOTE: Sadly, for the first time, my last email to my Senator, Steve Southerland, opposing the bill has gone unanswered.

UPDATE: R. Neal at KnoxViews has more on the topic, noting that despite local government requests for AT&T to go ahead and offer a plan without the new bill in place, AT&T declined.

Battle Intense on Flawed Cable Franchise Change

Once again today, state legislatures take up the issue of some very unwise changes to how cable franchises are provided and regulated. It's been the single most dollar-gulping lobby effort this year in state government, with current spending at just over $4 million. (And that's just the amount as of April of this year.)

Other reports note how intense the battle has become:

"TV4US [an AT&T lobbying firm] has completed two resident mailings. One mailing included an 11-by-5 inch postcard carrying a tear-off postcard to be mailed back to the group. On April 3, the group delivered 14,000 of these return postcards to state legislators. The cards asserted that cable rates have gone down 28% to 42% in communities where competition exists. The cited source is a January 2006 Bank of America Equity Research study. The card asserts that reform laws in other states have brought lower prices and better services.

“The message is completely wrong,” said Stacey Briggs, executive director of the Tennessee Cable Telecommunications Association. The TCTA and municipal groups such as the National Association of Telecommunications Officers and Advisors are critical of such statements, questioning whether those rate estimates include unpublished, short-term acquisition rates. Cable incumbents also note that telephone companies, in discussing their video plans, state they don’t intend to compete on price.

Briggs said 18,000 visitors to the site have opted to send an e-mail or a fax to legislators, arguing against the telco-friendly bills pending in both chambers there.

Two weeks ago, TV4US supporters passed out pink plastic pigs in the legislative plaza in Nashville. The message: When pigs fly, cable rates will go down. Briggs said the effort played upon “consumer misconceptions” that alternative providers will charge lower rates. Few legislators are citing rate cuts as a reason to pass franchising reform, however, he said."

Today, and hopefully not too late, I sent an email expressing my strong opposition to the bill to Commerce, Labor and Agriculture Committee Chairman Senator Steve Southerland. While earlier emails with the Senator contained some doubts the bill would pass, he has over the last few weeks, supplied 10 amendments to the bill which seem aimed at insuring it's passage.

This is the email I sent:
"Dear Sen. Southerland,

I appreciate your previous responses to my emails regarding the proposed change of state law for cable franchises. I remain completely opposed to this new law, for reasons detailed below.

However, I must first express some disappointment and confusion that all the amendments to the Senate bill 1933 were sponsored by you, as you sit as the Chairman of the Commerce, Labor and Agriculture Committee. Rather than standing opposed to this new proposed legislation, you seem to have added 10 amendments which instead attempt to encourage support for the bill.

Countless city governments, county governments (including Hamblen), and organizations like the Tenn. Municipal League have all adopted resolutions in clear opposition to this bill's passage -- did these same groups contact you and ask you to amend the bill for easier passage?

I note that while your amendments did include sections which would not hand over local control of rights-of-way controls, the language does include requirements that any customer must first file complaints about cable service to a city or county government, which would then forward the complaint to the cable provider, and that mediation would then move to the courts if resolutions could not be found. The state, which seeks by this bill to take franchise authority away from local control, is then utterly absent from addressing concerns of customers, putting all burden on local government.

Since locals would then be the ones responsible for any court costs in a losing effort, the locals would have little interest in pursuing such cases. The state, as these amendments make clear, provide no oversight to this plan for state-licensed franchises.

The current laws also require cable franchise holders to develop plans and strategies to expand, or build out, their services to insure the broadest and most comprehensive availability of services. This new bill eliminates such efforts. Since more and more businesses and communities must have internet access in order to compete in our growing global marketplace, to remove such incentives and guarantees will, I fear, only insure that the most rural of areas will be lacking. Rural areas, Senator, are your constituents, those you should be serving.

Also, as written, current cable and internet providers who have local franchise agreements, would now be able to make a state franchise agreement which would also eliminate the requirements to further or continue their efforts to expand services within a service area. How is such a change a benefit to residents and customers?

Could please explain why you found it necessary to add these 10 amendments, which seem aimed at shoring up support for this unwise legislation? Similar bills submitted to states nationwide have failed more often than they have succeeded.

Thanks for your time and your replies to my emails,
Joe Powell

NOTE: The TML Newspaper reports that a condition on build outs was added to the bill by amendment,however, as they report:

""The amendment only required to provide video to 25 percent of the households in which it provides telephone service. This minimal requirement could be fully satisfied by offering service
in just two of the state’s largest markets; providing no assurances
or protections for the remainder of the state. Moreover, the
build out amendment adopted last week does not provide for
any penalty should AT&T fail to meet this meager requirement."

A link to the Senate directory is here.
A link to the House directory is here.

Porn Barbie and the State Trooper

There just aren't many stories in the news in Tennessee about porn stars and the Highway Patrol, but li'l Barbie Cummings is changing all that.

On the Knoxville-based porn starlet's blog entry of May 7th, the actress claims she had a roadside romp with a patrol officer just outside of Lebanon. According to her, she pleasured the patrolman, who took pictures of said pleasuring, which she posted on her blog. (And fine, fine, if you wish to see the porn blog entry, [CORRECTION: after some thought, I decided it was bad ju-ju to link to a porn page here, sorry, If you are determined to find it you will, but I won't help!!], I warn you right now, this Barbie is not the one sold in stores, and her blog may make you want to wash your eyes out with bleach.)

Trooper James Randy Moss (heh heh -- 'randy") has been suspended as this event is investigated, although li'l Barbie appears in a Knoxville News Sentinel Article hoisting her copy of the ticket and says "I didn't get out of anything. It was not a trade. Just like a guy - he got his, and I still got the speeding ticket."

The KNS report has other nifty, joke-ready statements, like:

-- She gives her age as 21. (Yeah, once, for a year, about eight or nine years ago, she was 21.)

-- She says once she "advised" the trooper of her career, he let her sit next to him in his patrol car while he brought up her website on his in-car laptop. (So that's what they call it nowadays!)

I had really not noticed this story at all (yes, I avoid watching the local newscasters) until I noticed a dozen or so people searching for "Barbie porn highway patrol" and landing on my page, and found out the grim details. Of all the comments many web sites marking this roadside attraction, the one I liked best was from a fellow who said upon seeing the unclothed Barbie on her blog: "Man, she's not from the Tennessee Valley, she's from Silicone Valley."

Most Conservative and Liberal Places in TN

A question has been posed by a sort of new resident to Tennessee, via KnoxViews, about what is the most Conservative place in Tennessee and what is the most Liberal.

Like one commenter mentioned on the KV site said, the 'corridor along I-81' is mighty dang Conservative, something I can testify about having lived along that corridor since about 1977. Having lived in Carter, Washington and Johnson counties, worked in Sullivan, Cocke, Greene and Hawkins and Hamblen and Jefferson -- indeed these are deeply Conservative places.

However, back in 2000, I had the chance to work in southeastern TN, in places like Bradley, Monroe, Meigs, McMinn, Loudon and McMinn counties. I kept seeing signs on main and back roads for the Army of God, and talked to many residents who were scary in their Rightness.

Is there a single answer for either question - most Conservative and most Liberal?

My snarky first response to 'what's the most Conservative place in Tennessee?' is this: it's the part that lies between Memphis and Bristol.

Snarky response to Most Liberal? The answer is my house and the houses of my friends.

However, even a label like Liberal doesn't really describe my home or those of my friends. To me, we have always had several things in common - we tend to be open-minded, tolerant and fearful of ideologies which demand lock-step agreement.

Since I was raised mostly in Middle TN and traveled some in parts West, I have noticed the state's temperament to be less Conservative as I moved in the Middle and West directions. Still, even that has changed over the last 10 or 15 years.

My ultimate response to the question of most Conservative has to be the entire 1st District. They have solidly backed hardcore Conservative GOPers for Congress since 1881, and only once since 1859 has the Representative not been a Republican.

It boggles my mind too, since the entire area has remained a low income, drop-out ridden, good-old-boy haven for over 100 years and there exists very little thought in the public to move past this point. I've been reluctant to admit it, but the residents seem to like it the way it is. So be it. It's their decision to accept the status quo.

Am I a Liberal or a Conservative? Well, like the old saying goes, it depends on who I'm standing next to.

Camera Obscura - 100 Movies, 100 Quotes, 100 Numbers

Think you're a movie fan? Test your abilities with the following little video quiz which is also just fun to watch and marvel at it's creation. This clip was made available online in February of this year, but I found it via MetaFilter last night. More fun than a monkey knife fight!!

You'll see 100 movies and 100 quotes, each quote, from very well known movies, includes a number and the clips countdown from 100 to 1. Some of the selections were just brilliant - I loved the movies chosen for the numbers 8, 30, 31, and 45.

And not to brag - well, wait, yes I will brag - I watched this clip last night and with no outside help or cheating I was able to name 93 out of the 100 movies. That's why I am the Master of Motion Pictures, The Keeper of Useless Knowledge. The clip is below, try your best, and I'll include a complete list of answers in the comments on this post. Good luck!!

Gas Pains Evoke The 'Blamethrower'

The response this week from oil companies to questions about skyrocketing prices at the pumps was pure arrogance.

Thier investment strategies aren't to blame. It's all the consumer's fault, or some other group. They won't increase refineries because the government is pushing for decreased consumption over the next 10 years:

"John Felmy, chief economist for the American Petroleum Institute, said in a phone interview that whenever the industry tries to add refining capacity, it faces opposition from surrounding communities. Moreover, Felmy questioned why the industry would make expensive refining expansions when President Bush is calling for a 20 percent reduction in gasoline use by 2017.

"But the Consumer Federation's Mark Cooper said the refining industry hasn't even tried to build new refineries and has instead closed 50 since the 1990s rather than make investments to make them comply with pollution laws.

Oddly, crude oil prices are lower now than last year at this time.

Cooper goes on to say:

"This is just mismanagement," he said. "But they get away with it because there is no competitive discipline."

And in the Consumer Affairs statement prior to the congressional hearings this week:

"Thirty-three states and the District of Columbia now have average prices at or above $3 a gallon with Kentucky, Florida and Maryland the latest states to join the list.

Consumers are feeling the gas price bite as the average U.S. household is spending $1,000 more per year on gasoline than it did five years ago, according to several consumer groups.

Rural households have been hardest hit because they spend about 20 percent more on gas than urban residents, according to Labor Department figures.

A group representing U.S. motorists is asking Congress to investigate current gasoline refinery problems that have caused a painful spike in prices at the pump.

The American Automobile Association says lawmakers should look at the link between these supply shortages and rising oil company profits."

There were also claims that the changeover to "summer blend" gasoline was part of the supply problem, though last year that excuse emerged in March not May. All excuses are valid in the minds of big oil.

Even with profits up 39% last year, oil companies say they are helpless to affect the market.

But it's consumers that are helpless - and big oil uses the 'Blamethrower" to deflect criticism. It's your fault and it's no one's fault.

I've noticed the usual "let's boycott gas for a day" movements attempting to bring attention to the issue. I've been thinking we should start designating one day a month for the next year as boycott gasoline day. Within a few months, the boycott might just catch on. Especially since gas is headed over the $3 mark for the rest of the summer.

Gonzales and the Chaos In Justice Dept

The ever-shifting landscape of memory and action from Attorney General Alberto Gonzales has become a muddled mess, with facts bobbing up and then sinking away as nearly daily accounts of troubling scandals change and move and shift.

While some neo-con pundits have cried "Nothing to see here!!" regarding the firing and hiring of US attorneys, the swirling contradictions could easily cloud man's mind like Lamont Cranston tackling evildoers in some episode of "The Shadow."

Gonzales has claimed "I am accountable even though I don't know what my department does" about the problems, claimed no solid memory of the series of events, and this week has claimed his deputy, Paul McNulty is to blame for everything.

And even more ugly beans were spilled yesterday when details were presented to Congress about how Gonzales was pushing for continuing a lawless wiretap program in the intensive care ward of John Ashcroft:

Even his colleagues and fellow grads from Harvard bought an ad in the Washington Post which blistered the man and his actions:

"I’m sure he is a very fine fellow, but it’s really troubling what he is standing for and what the administration of George W. Bush is standing for. We couldn’t stand by this any longer."

If Congress does not demand Gonzales' resignation very, very soon then the chaos and the stink of this mess may follow them all back home. Likewise, those who claim there is "nothing to see here" are deceiving themselves and everyone else at the nation's peril.

Fave Restaurant Meme

It's a most intriguing question, presented to me by the lovable Tits McGee -- name your five favorite places for dining out. It must be noted that her food blog makes me delirious with hunger. I'll happily offer my faves and then ask some other bloggers to play along with this list-madness is they wish. Or if you, dear reader, can suggest your faves, I'll be equally happy to receive your input.

There are many challenges in answering her meme about my favorite places to dine out, as the selection of restaurants in Morristown is truly bleak. If you love fast food or the omnipresent buffet/trough menus (sheltered dining via a sneeze-guard), you're in heaven in Mo'town. (Which Hardee's location do yo like best? The one on the East end of town or on the West end?)

Otherwise, there just isn't much to recommend. There are some non-chain/franchise choices, but sadly, none that ever made me want to say "I love to eat there!"

Some years back while working in Prison Forge -- I mean Pigeon Forge, sorry -- we would often go to a local cafeteria, whose name I have erased from my memory. It only had two good points - it was very close to where I worked and it had the funniest staff. Every time we ate there, some scowling woman would yell at us "Havin' a meat???" I just loved that. The food wasn't very good, but for some reason "Havin' a meat???" always made me feel great.

So I go most often into Knoxville, where there are also many fast food or chain options, but also many unique places too. Some of my favorites are no longer in operation, I fear, like La Paz, where the food portions were huge and the pitchers of Margaritas were endless. Anyway, in no particular order, here are my choices:

1. Nama Sushi Bar - great sushi and Japanese food, which The Editor took me to on my last birthday. I was in swooning from the food and the plating there was a notch above most places (hell, they actually have plating). In fact, I plan to go there in the next few days and experience it again.

2. Tomato Head - if there is a food I never get tired of, it's pizza. Tomato Head makes the best in East Tennessee. Period. The End.

3. Ridgewood Barbecue - this place is legendary and worth every legend. It's a small place to dine, in a small building on the Elizabethton Highway near Bluff City, but they have the best barbecue in the state in my opinion. You must order a side of their beans. Better than words can say.

4. Italian Market and Grill - another long drive out to west Knox for this place, but every time I go inside the place, my eyes water from the aroma of garlic. That's a fine thing. I could almost fill up on their fresh bread, which you must dip into some olive oil and black pepper.

Obviously, I am going to have to go sample some new places, as I cannot list 5 places, only 4.

And I'm really hungry now, writing about food. The one other place I always like to eat is my kitchen. Whether it's a burnt-weenie sandwich or something off the grill the food here is always fine. Cooking meat outside is always a pleasure.

For five folks to tag to add to this meme -- here ya go:

The Editor needs to jump in on this one.
So does her sister in California, Valley Grrrl.
The Vol Abroad gets a tag too. I wanna know where she goes in London.
And Alice at 10,000 Monkeys And A Camera gets tagged.
And Mack gets a tag at Coyote Chronicles.

Remember, I need suggestions too. so add yours in the comments!

More on The Student Field Trip Gone Wrong

The school motto for Scales Elementary? It's Always About The Children!

This story of school faculty faking a gun attack on 6th grade students is being widely reported and late yesterday the school announced the suspension without pay of two faculty members, who are suspended for a few weeks until the end of this school year.

From accounts I've been reading, the "prank" is a regular feature of these student trips. It's worth noting these days that any "prank" committed by students is likely to lead to disciplinary actions, so the faculty cited at Scales should not be surprising.

And while the event is being called a 'fake gun attack' or a 'common hazing' on students, it reminds me of the frat I joined in college. I was reluctant to join any frat, but what sold me was the fact that Lambda Chi Alpha outlawed hazing at their chapters in the mid-1970s. Hazing is meant to do just one thing - humiliate new members. And there was no way I was going to volunteer to be treated like crap in order to join any organization. It's mindless and pointless and wildly dangerous - and the average behavior at any frat can turn crazy-dangerous anyway, so why create a chance for even more danger?

Perhaps parents nationwide should just be grateful that 'gun attack drills' aren't a common part of the school year, though I won't be surprised when that does become common. Parents perhaps would be better served if school faculties were given some sort of disaster prep training - but given that most schools already have security teams working, then it's those security forces which need proper training.

I find it rather astonishing that someone from Scales attending the week-long trip did not stand up and say to the planners of the fake attack that is was a bone-dumb and dangerous idea. Doesn't the state mandate anti-bullying codes and procedures? Did the faculty at Scales feel they were above reproach?

I'd bet most students past the 3rd or 4th grade would tell you they endure copious amounts of discomfort and challenges from their peers and their daily experiences in the system. Much of those types of events certainly inform students that you have to be tough on the outside, be able to walk away from some hateful times and learn to cope with stupid and mindless rituals.

Aunt B pegged it very well with her response to Kleinheider's claim that this event was good, manly behavior by the now-suspended school faculty:

"It’s not good clean manly fun to take a bunch of eleven year old kids into the forest and pretend like, no matter how briefly, you’re going to kill them".

TN Student Field Trip Turns National News

6th-grade students from Scales Elementary in middle Tennessee and their teachers have been making the cable news networks reports following an incident last week while they were on a field trip to Fall Creek Falls State Park. The KNS article reports it like this:

"Staff members of a Murfreesboro elementary school staged a fake gunman attack during a school trip, telling them it was not a drill as children cried and hid under tables.

Parents of the sixth-grade students at Scales Elementary were outraged after learning about the prank that occurred Thursday night during a weeklong trip to a state park.

Assistant Principal Don Bartch, who was present, said the scenario was intended as a learning experience and only lasted five minutes.

"We got together and discussed what we would have done in a real situation," he said."

Over at Volunteer Voters, Kleinheider weighs in with his take:

"What this incident tells us is that we cannot treat young men and women like what they need to become — adults. What we are telling each other is that children need to be coddled and sheltered from anything that approaches a deviation from “the way things are done.”

We have, all due respect, become a feminized and sissified culture. I’m no alpha male, but I know that much to be true.

Our elementary schools are run by women, by and large — they are, they have been and they will continue to be. Not only do our kids have to get by the overemphasis on security in our culture, not only to they have to try and emerge as true men and woman in a therapeutic culture, they have to deal with the fact that they may go through many, many years of elementary school and even middle school without ever encountering a male teacher."

Brittney responds to VV, sensing some oddness to his perspective.

What say you?