GOP: Global Orgasm for Peace

"You don't need a good reason to have an orgasm," he said. "Even a stupid one is OK." (link)

The story of the event planned for December 22nd has been sneaky-Peteing it's way into the news, the internet tubes have begun to mention it, and at best the proposed worldwide attempt for a "synchronized orgasmic event" with participants focusing their .... um ... efforts at projecting hopes and thoughts for world peace can't really hurt anything.

There are some who think the event can produce scientifically measurable results for positive human consciousness enhancement. I have to admit there are scientifically measurable results for, oh, say, hurling bombs and rockets or suicide bombers, which do in fact create a whole heap of negativity all around.

Consider what might happen if it were required that diplomats engage in sexual behavior with each other prior to or following their foreign diplomacy gatherings. No photos or cameras or webcasts of the act, no, but I imagine those press conferences afterward would exude a certain level of honest if awkward discussions as it would surpass the impact of opposing forces just shaking hands at such events.

Is this all a sublimely ridiculous idea? Maybe - but you have to admit those who do participate in this will probably be in a better mood than those who do not.

The Global Orgasm organizers have a blog (of course) and they also remind would-be participants that a partner isn't necessary. Preferable though.

Promotional Shat

I cannot believe some advertising exec got paid and the studio folk approved the following as a great campaign tagline for the new William Shatner hosted game show, "Show Me The Money":

"It's Shat-tastic."

Blame The Atheist?

An essay from the ex-boyfriend of Ann Coulter and Laura Ingraham being crammed with ill-informed, ignorant and just plain wrong concepts should be no surprise. The self-righteous posturing of these dubious moralizers gives proof to the idea that no matter how stupid and inaccurate an idea may be, the more it is repeated ad nauseum by writers/pundits the more likely it is to be deemed truth.

The essay I saw recently by Dinesh D'Souza in Christian Science Monitor is a mashup of neo-con buzzwords and idiotic proclamations meant to appeal to thick-skulled xenophobes, that peculiar segment of society who crave desperately for some Bad Evil to blame for every woe of mankind.

A sample:

"Moreover, many of the conflicts that are counted as "religious wars" were not fought over religion. They were mainly fought over rival claims to territory and power. Can the wars between England and France be called religious wars because the English were Protestants and the French were Catholics? Hardly.

The same is true today. The Israeli-Palestinian conflict is not, at its core, a religious one. It arises out of a dispute over self-determination and land. Hamas and the extreme orthodox parties in Israel may advance theological claims - "God gave us this land" and so forth - but the conflict would remain essentially the same even without these religious motives
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"Whatever the motives for atheist bloodthirstiness, the indisputable fact is that all the religions of the world put together have in 2,000 years not managed to kill as many people as have been killed in the name of atheism in the past few decades."
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"It's time to abandon the mindlessly repeated mantra that religious belief has been the greatest source of human conflict and violence. Atheism, not religion, is the real force behind the mass murders of history."

D'Souza even has a new book out "The Enemy At Home: The Cultural Left And It's Responsibility For 9/11." It isn't religion, he says, it's those damn secular Left Wingers.

But the sheer lunacy and plain mis-construction of history reveals his willful ignorance of facts, and a bizarre, if not fanatical religious devotion to neo-con morality. Clue phone time: if you expect politics to provide moral guidance, you will soon find yourself in a land governed by the objectives of religious war.

His thesis ignores the reality that Europe was racked by political and religious warfare for centuries, with political might obtained by first creating a religious and moral authority to conduct a God-willed warfare. Also ignored are the intent of the founders of this country, who sought to provide a clear and specific wall to prevent religion from being a state-endorsed objective.

History shows that the 17th century American colonies often saw laws demanding adherence to religion on pain of torture, death or exile. Much of the extermination of Native Americans was due to a moral certainty that the religious beliefs of "savages" were reason enough to destroy those peoples, and debate over whether or not to allow for certain Native American religious practices continues to this very day.

D'Souza also claims the warmongering mindset of Hitler, for instance, was that of an atheist. Yet, as noted in White's Creek Journal recently, Hitler proclaimed "Today Christians stand at the head of our country. We want to fill our culture again with the Christian spirit. We want to burn out all the recent immoral developments in literature, in the theatre, and in the press-in short, we want to burn out the poison of immorality which has entered into our whole life and culture as a result of liberal excess during recent years."

The nonsense of D'Souza's essay is common chorus among so many who bang drums of cultural warfare. It may come as a surprise to some, but Christ teaches in the New Testament that one not attend the "mega-church" but rather gather in small groups in His name.

I noticed again with a frightening regularity this year that so many candidates seeking office felt compelled to include their religious orientation as part of their campaign for federal office. Sadly, none of them seem aware of this section of Article VI of the Constitution:

"...but no religious test shall ever be required as a qualification to any office or public trust under the United States."

By all means, attend your church of choice. Be committed to your beliefs. But never confuse the function of government with the function of religion. And be wary of those who seek to combine the two.

Odd Christmas Toys 2006

Forgive my time traveling nostalgia for Christmas Past. I know I'm a few years older than dirt and the toys I desired, even lusted for, when I was a boy were likely to be composed of only two elements: plastic and my imagination.

I do remember the time a friend's older brother one post-unwrapping day brought out an amazing gift he had received. It was the holy of holies It was James Bond's attache case based on the "From Russia With Love" movie. It had the hidden dagger, pistol with barrel extension and stock and silencer, passport, code book, money and even business cards. It sold for around 20 bucks.

Here in 2006, you can get a "new" version of the case for ... wait for it ... $4300. It comes with a Vaio TX Notebook, and various digital goodies. Can't be a spy without the digital toys. (And yes, I marvel at the Bond video game of the entire movie "From Russia With Love" available now. But the comingling of Bond and Barbie is just wrong.)

Way back in the ancient times of my own childhood, I lived in a town so small that toys were available at a dry goods store, or in a teeny section of four-aisled grocery store. And we aren't talking depression era days here. Still, since I was barely eyeball-high to the counter at the dry goods store, I took more pleasure than most could imagine scanning the bins of green army soldiers, red and yellow and blue Indians and Cowboys, and for the hi-tech kids, there was a Hot Wheels section with lengths of plastic track which could create the physics-defying looped section. If memory serves, after about an hour of hurling the wee plastic cars down the ramps, we dismantled the track and used the pieces as swords and smacked the crap out of each other.

Good times.

The knowledge needed here in 2006 for most-popular toys and the amount of money needed just zaps my time-addled brain. And truly, some of the stuff out there is just plain freaky.

Take a look at the kid's tattoo parlor playset. Yeah, kids can now pretend to be practioners of body modification with a toy tattoo gun. And who doesn't yearn for their kid to wear a camo cap backwards?

Maybe you can find a Home Mullet Salon playset for the kids too.







Then there's the most curious looking Dora toy. Kids are never too young to think in Freudian imagery I guess.








For the 0ver-18 game and toy lovers, I'm sure Honky Tonk Homicide, a redneck murder mystery dinner party, is gobs of fun. Marks the first time I've ever seen the words "redneck" and "dinner party" used in conjunction.

Camera Obscura - Faulkner's Vampire; Bond's Revival

A full length screenplay by William Faulkner was discovered a few years ago which is his only unproduced and still complete screenplay. And it's a vampire movie.

Lee Caplin found the script some years back, and is now pitching the project around Hollywood. The original was set in an unnamed Eastern Europe location, but the idea now is to set it in the Deep South. More details can be found at this link.

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This weekend also brings the return on the creation of writer Ian Fleming, a somewhat violent and eccentric spy named James Bond. The actor in the lead is Daniel Craig - a fine choice given his acting chops in movies like the Tarantino-like crime thriller "Layer Cake." And the story this time is based -- make that loosely based -- on the novel "Casino Royale."

Observers have cheered the movie for closely following Fleming's story ... but there are some significant alterations which make me irritable. The novel - and Bond's assignment - are quite specific. He is sent to challenge another spy/terrorist who goes by the name Le Chiffre in Monte Carlo at the baccarat table. Yet the movie changes the game to a high stakes Texas Hold-Em game.

Sorry, but Bond playing Texas Hold-Em is like Bond chugging a bottle of wine while eating a double bacon cheeseburger. Wrong, wrong, wrong.

Fleming's books are tight and compact thrillers, barely 200 pages each. Bond is brutal, yes, and something of a loose cannon. And there has only been one occurrence by my reckoning of the movies following the books closely and that's the first film, "Dr. No."

Don't get me wrong - I like the Bond films, with the exceptions of those with Roger Moore who is more Austin Powers than James Bond. And one I like very much is "You Only Live Twice" yet ever since that film, producers have crafted a series of wildly improbable stunts and goofy gadgets and clever title songs. Fleming's stories for the most part were abandoned.

I plan to see this new Bond within the next few days, but smart money says the most faithful presentation of Fleming's work can be found in "Dr. No."

A side note: the trippy weird version of "Casino Royale" from the 1960s is entertaining as a time capsule only, but a bitter rivalry between actors takes place between Peter Sellers (as Bond) and Orson Welles (as Le Chiffre). The refused to be on set together and each shot their "confrontation" separately and film editors had to do the rest.

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Every movie trailer you can think of for upcoming films is here. Be prepared to spend quite a bit of time saying things like "oooh!! this looks great" and "awww, yer kidding me!"

Speechless

Grim news today from Oak Ridge blogger AT, about his wife who has been so critically ill.

I offer my deepest sympathies to AT and his family, as do so many thousands of others who have been reading AT's accounts of what has been happening for the last few weeks.

Her illness arrived without warning and has been truly devastating. None of it seems fair or right

Words seem a feeble thing right now.

But the hopes and wishes and prayers from so many, I trust, do offer a sense that this troubled time is being shared by friends and strangers alike. We all send you and your family much love and concern.

UPDATE: A memorial fund has been set up for the Atomic Tumor family. To donate, send a check to: Barbara J. Kilpatrick Memorial Fund C/O ORNL Federal Credit Union P.O.Box 365 Oak Ridge, TN 37831.

Carmina Burana on Banjo?

I know the first time I heard the music from the Carmina Burana Fantasy it was in the 1981 movie "Excalibur." I quoted the lines from that movie for days and weeks, but it was the rousing score of the music I recall the most.

It's been a part of many movies - the opening scene to "Jackass: The Movie", "Natural Born Killers," and even in "South Park".

It's been used to sell products like Old Spice, Reebok, Pringles and Volkswagen.

But I've never heard it the way banjo player Sandy Bull has put it together.

Mayor Injured, Bear Killed

I'm not sure if it's something in the air or what. Tennessee officials are packing some heat and they aren't afraid to use it.

Seems that elected officials are not to be messed with. First we had Knox County Commissioner "Lumpy" taking down an would-be robber, (and be sure to check out the accused's MySpace page).

Then State Senator Tim Burchett says he caught a group of youngsters during a break-in and held them at gunpoint, though he did offer them chocolate chip cookies.

And Cocke County Mayor Iliff McMahan, out on a bear hunt on Monday, fell and injured his leg and was somehow still able to take out a bear. The Newport Plain Talk reports:

"The next thing I knew, there was something big and black coming at me. I said, 'Oh heck,' and shot the bear twice, killing the animal as it was about 10 feet away." McMahan, who says he is not a big hunter, said the 337-pound black bear was easily the largest bear he had shot. The mayor had to basically crawl his way out of the woods since the other members had to tend to the dogs and the dead bear who were shot by the club on Monday. Negotiations are under way in the McMahan household as to the final resting place for the prize hunting trophy."

Horrorfest Lands In East Tennessee

A weekend of macabre movies arrives this coming weekend - and the shocking truth that the mini-festival of horrors is playing in Morristown is .... did I say shocking? Well, that's me. Shocked and awed. Score two points (or is it eight?) as the After Dark Horrorfest: 8 Films To Die For will be presented at Paradigm Cinemas.

Part of me is convinced not all 8 films will be here, or that the showtimes won't allow me to see all of them, or some bad thing will happen to otherwise shortchange this horror fan. The fest is marketed as a collection of movies too graphic and ghoulish and disturbing for general audiences, but hey, they are being released to theatres and not right to DVD.

The movies are playing all over the state and the nation. For a full list of theatres and movies, you can check out the official website. Apparently no bulk tickets to all the movies are available, you'll have to pay for each one. Suck.

The movies are a broad mix of low budgets and large, some stars are featured, many are newcomers. How broad is the range? Well, there's the new movie from J-Horror icon, Takashi Shimizu, who created the "Grudge" series and a new funny/scary flick called Snoop Dog's Hood of Horror.

You can go to this YouTube link for a page with a preview to each of the movies. Previews are also on the Horrorfest web page

The Paradigm Cinemas website is here, but sorry, no tickets online.

Otherwise, please allow me to say "Woot!!"

Tax Relief for Elderly A Tall Order

Voters across the state said Yes in huge numbers to allowing for a change in the tax laws and provide some limits for senior citizens regarding property taxes. Today's Tennessean editorial on the topic says Nashville should lead the way in this change:

"So it is not surprising that (Mayor Bill) Purcell would react quickly to the opportunity again to support such relief. In his letter to council members last week, Purcell described the effort as a way to help seniors "live out their lives in dignity in the homes where they raised their families and created the neighborhoods that bind our city together."

As lawmakers consider tax relief for seniors, which is highly popular, they must do so with the knowledge that it will mean other sources of revenue will have to bear more of the burden. Few people will argue with property tax relief for the elderly, but the trick will be in finding ways to make up the difference. So the effort must be handled carefully."

The devil is truly in the details for this measure.

The approved amendment states that cities and counties can enact the change, which could easily create mass confusion - what if the state's 95 counties create 95 different changes in the tax structure? And if cities can likewise draft their own laws, how many different tax laws will be created?

The approved amendment states that cities and counties can enact the change, which could easily create mass confusion - what if the state's 95 counties create 95 different changes in the tax structure? And if cities can likewise draft their own laws, how many different tax laws will be created? And as I understand the change, the General Assembly must first decide how much senior citizens can earn to even be eligible for a tax freeze.

The fact is no county or city is obligated to enact any changes. State agencies which advise cities and counties are certain to push for uniform laws, but the state's communities seldom act in agreement on anything.

This was a poorly conceived amendment, requiring zero compliance. The ballots themselves had errors in the wording of the change and "corrections" to the ballot wording were nearly impossible to find on election day - the polling place I went to had voting machines on one side of the room and the corrected wording for the ballot measure were posted on the opposite side of that room. As I understood it, the change in wording was supposed to be posted on the voting machines. That just did not happen at each polling location.

The size of the senior citizen population nationwide is going to grow by huge numbers within the decade and those in charge of drafting future tax rates are keenly aware of the coming changes.

I would expect changes in tax rates will be very very slow to emerge. I'm sure special committees to investigate the issue will be created and their eventual reports will arrive in some distant future. Glaciers will move quicker than any change in the tax laws.

Keep The Watchdog Alive

An excellent example of bipartisan efforts working to the benefit of all taxpayers and to insure that reconstruction programs in Iraq are effective has been provided by Republican Senator Susan Collins and Democrat Senator Russ Feingold.

The lawmakers are intent on keeping alive the special Inspector General's program to track billions of dollars which Republicans in the House tried to kill. It makes no sense, as both senators argued today, to stop such a highly productive and much needed oversight program.

Sen. Collins says:

"We must keep the watchdog on the job," Collins said. "It is inconceivable that we would remove this aggressive oversight while the American taxpayer is still spending billions of dollars on Iraq reconstruction projects.

The SIGR site details how vital their work has been, how much work remains and clearly deserves to be allowed to complete it's task. Only those seeking to defraud taxpayers would want to see this program end.

But You've Been Murdered!!

Not a good day when you're lying handcuffed on the deck of your own home and deputies tell you that you've been murdered.

Yet, that's what happened according to one Cocke County couple, who have filed a $12 million lawsuit against the deputies and the sheriff's department. They also state in their lawsuit that officers provided no warrant either.

The press report also has fascinating details of the suit:

"The Lovells allege in their lawsuit that Cocke County Sheriff's Dep. David Parton, Sgt. Armando Fontes, and Lt. Doug Atkins attempted to use a large landscape timber to break down the door to their residence, located at 180 Solitaire Way, then entered the residence with guns drawn, including an assault rifle. The lawsuit contends that the Lovells were forced to lie on the front deck, while scantily clad, and that Jean Lovell was tackled and handled roughly by Fontes in the process. The Lovells also contend that, when they asked why the action was being taken, Jean Lovell was told that, "You're the one who was supposed to have been murdered ...."
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"Alternatively, if there existed a valid reason to search for a victim and/or a perpetrator, it is shown to the court that the alleged victim and/or perpetrator were not of a size sufficient that they could fit inside a kitchen drawer, or a bathroom drawer, or a drawer in a piece of furniture. "In short, there was no valid reason to rummage through plaintiffs' personal effects," stated the lawsuit."

I suppose saying "I'm not dead!!" just isn't proof.

UPDATE: I mentioned it in the comments section in this post, but here is the link to the LA Times story on Cocke County, which, naturally, local officials did not look kindly on.

PS3 vs Wii vs XBox 360

The real battle for the next few months won't just be a policy debate in Washington, DC.

From coast to coast and around the world, the battle is about to begin for the minds of young and old alike as crazed consumers begin measuring the wins and losses between the three new videogame consoles - PlayStation 3, Wii and XBox 360. Billions of dollars are at stake.

I know in the gaming community I'm about three days older than dirt. I got addicted early in life, using electronic stimulants like those found on a Commodore 64, the Atari system, and to further reveal my age ... pinball machines.

I still use my ever-reliable PS2, and yes, I'm still playing ancient games like HotShots Golf and Star Wars Battlefront. (I once considered including the fact that I completed God of War and Max Payne 1 and 2 on job applications under Accomplishments.) But, I faithfully watch the most important gaming overview show ever period and amen, and that's X-Play with Adam Sessler and Morgan Webb. I've suffered hand cramps and even missed work a few times lost in button-mashing madness, powered by Doritos and Mountain Dew. And yet I am fully aware that on the Gamers Scale, I barely rate a 3 out of 10 for hip and ultimate gamer.

With Christmas approaching, the stores will be feverishly attempting to keep these competing consoles stocked. But which to buy??

Engadget has an exhaustive round-up of the pros and cons on each system.

And while I really enjoy PlayStation most, I am fascinated by the Wii - wireless controllers where arm and hand movements control the events in the game -- I say "Woot!!"

Come Take A Nashville Ride

You are invited to come join me as I guest blog at Nashville Is Talking this weekend.

Also, I will once again tomorrow offer up some free tickets to performances at the Comedy Festival being held next week in Las Vegas.

Check into Nashville Is Talking tomorrow morning for all the details and your chance to win.

Also, if you're a regular reader of my movie and entertainment posts on Fridays, you'll have to check out the Nashville blog for all the good stuff and the oddest entertainment news I can find. (Like that'll be tough to provide!!)

UPDATE: What is the connection between the remake of "Dawn of the Dead" and the NBC comedy "The Office"? You can find the answers in this post I just added to Nashville Is Talking.

Charges Sought Against Rumsfeld

I'm not sure the charges can stick, but since Donald Rumsfeld has resigned, he also loses immunity protections. However, I can't see the case proceeding very far. Still, a report in Time magazine says a case is moving through the legal system in Germany:

"Just days after his resignation, Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld is about to face more repercussions for his involvement in the troubled wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. New legal documents, to be filed next week with Germany's top prosecutor, will seek a criminal investigation and prosecution of Rumsfeld, along with Attorney General Alberto Gonzales, former CIA director George Tenet and other senior U.S. civilian and military officers, for their alleged roles in abuses committed at Iraq's Abu Ghraib prison and at the U.S. detention facility at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba."

Free Comedy Festival Tickets!

I have some free tickets for you to see performances at the Comedy Festival in Las Vegas for next week. That means several lucky readers will get a chance to see Bob Saget and Jamie Kennedy or Nick Cannon or Maxim's Real Men of Comedy. Truly and no joke.

The Comedy Festival website is here, presented by HBO and AEG Live, and there are tons of great acts ahead. Performers for the event, November 14-18 include Dane Cook, Chris Rock, Bill Maher, Dave Capelle, Damon Wayans, Jimmy Fallon and many many more.

If you want two tickets to Saget and Kennedy or Maxim's event - be one of first two people to respond ASAP in the comments. Include an email address to win!!

These tickets are flying fast! Act immediately to win!! Contest here closes at 5 pm EST.

UPDATE: Well the window of opportunity has closed!! Not takers of the freebies mean some other folks will have a chance at the tickets.

Conservative Comedy

Had to do a double take when Colbert collided with Limbaugh.

At least Colbert honestly creates satire.

Limbaugh creates ... well, ratings and money, yes. But satire appears often by nature of the double-sided blade of "truthiness" he flails around with in his ever-diminishing effort to entertain his true believers.

First, take a look at Limbaugh's attempt to get away from the Republican defeat on Tuesday:

"The way I feel is this: I feel liberated, and I'm going to tell you as plainly as I can why. I no longer am going to have to carry the water for people who I don't think deserve having their water carried. Now, you might say, "Well, why have you been doing it?" Because the stakes are high! Even though the Republican Party let us down, to me they represent a far better future for my beliefs and therefore the country's than the Democrat [sic] Party does and liberalism."

Now, comedian Stephen Colbert:

"Tomorrow you'’re all going to wake up in a Brave New World, a world where the constitution gets trampled by an army of terrorist clones created in a stem cell research lab run by homosexual doctors who sterilize their instruments over burning American flags. Where Tax and Spend Democrats take all your hard-earned money and use it to buy electric cars for National Public Radio and teach evolution to illegal immigrants. Oh, and everybody'’s high!!! Whoo!!! I'’ve had it! You people don'’t deserve a Republican majority. Screw this, I quit!"

(hat tip to Liberadio)

For sheer lunacy, however, nobody can touch the witless drooling of Bill O'Reilly.

If I Can Dream

It's the right time for some Elvis.

Goodbye To All That?

A double smackdown for Vice President Cheney has brought quick changes following the elections - Rumsfeld is out as Secretary of Defense (smack one) and Robert Gates, longtime ally of the first President Bush is in (smack two).

While speaking boldly for Rumsfeld last week, the fact was changes were being prompted by the president and Cheney's views on leadership were being pushed aside by President Bush.

"But sources told NBC News’ military analyst Bill Arkin that prior to the election, Vice President Dick Cheney argued with other politicians over whether Rumsfeld should stay. White House Chief of Staff Josh Bolten and others said Rumsfeld should be removed, the source said. Both sides agreed the decision would be made after the election, when Bush would make the final call based on how Republicans did.

According to the source, Bush agreed Rumsfeld should be removed after seeing election results favoring Democrats. Cheney then lost another argument, protesting Gates’ nomination as Rumsfeld’s replacement."

I say long overdue.

Next: will John Murtha be the new majority leader in the House?

Republicans Held Accountable

Time for a change. That's what voters across the country said in a majority of ballots. The shrill voices demonizing anyone not a Republican were provided a simple message yesterday - shut up.

It's always astounded me that Right Wing cheerleaders like Coulter and Limbaugh and Vice-President Cheney were never satisfied that Republicans held the majority at the Federal level. Any and all policy failures or personal doubts weren't their fault. It was the Evil Liberal, the Godless Democrat minority, the folk they would have us believe are secretly aiding terrorists.

With a clear voice the majority of Americans called "Bullshit" on all that.

Coulter must be a whirling dervish today to realize the first woman to reach the position of House speaker is not only a Democrat but a Liberal one. The Coulters and Malkins and the tiny echoes of blog-repeaters need to take stock and realize America rejects their whining.

Not only did the Democrats take a majority of seats in the House of Representatives, they did not lose any either. They took a majority of governor's races too, and again, did not lose any. And it appears the Democrats have just enough wins to take the Senate to a more balanced population, and again, lost no seats.

Blaming a non-existent, non-patriotic enemy is a fool's argument. Republicans did not just lose a campaign - they lost the confidence of America to be more ethical or moral, to shrink government intrusion into the private sector, to grow the economy for all citizens, to provide for the national security.

Six years into his presidency, George Bush has finally realized he should take time to meet with those who don't walk in lock-step agreement with him. After all, it was Bush himself who declared he was a Uniter and not a Divider. Time to pony up.

In Tennessee, the election of Bob Corker was no simple task. It was a squeaker of a victory. A few thousand votes could easily have gone the other way. The pressure is on now for him to provide leadership, not to rubber-stamp the party's wishes. Should he begin to drift into following the lobbyists and the party bosses, I'd expect he'll find himself out of office and out of favor with voters quickly.

Nationwide voters told the GOP they have been held accountable and found wanting.

Democrats and democrat leaders need to rise to this moment - correct the course.