Monday, August 28, 2006

Hip-Deep in Dumb

Some days I struggle mightily to restrain childish rants against the presence of The Stupid in our humble, warming globe. There are even times when The Stupid comforts me, reminding me that for all of humanity's achievements, Stupid is a great equalizer. Usually though, I get all self-important and gaze down my nose at creation, and that can't be good.

Sometimes the word Stupid really isn't the best descriptive term which applies to events and people. With that in mind, I'm trying to temper my confusion and outrage with Loving Kindness. (cough) So here is a collection of warm and fuzzy hugs of concern and acceptance for those events and people who do or have done something of ..... let's just call it"Questionable Worth."

In a contest between Barry Manilow and Stephen Colbert, the award goes to Manilow?? (Okay, that goes beyond "questionable" and straight to Stupid) The following moment from Colbert and Emmy winner Jon Stewart helps ... a little bit anyway.

Next - does President Bush sincerely believe a few stops and a few bland words to mark the anniversary of the devastation brought by Hurricane Katrina will raise his standings? He might as well start calling these useless speeches and visits the "Help Is Still On The Way Tour 2006", so that all he'll have to change from visit to visit is the year in which help, not yet presented, will soon be presented. An ABC story on this current event ends with a paragraph which reveals the real reason he has made a trip to the South:

Bush was ending the day in New Orleans, at dinner with state and local officials. On Wednesday, he is to appear at political fundraisers in Arkansas and Tennessee, although officials will be keeping an eye on [Tropical Storm] Ernesto in case it requires presidential attention."

If you wonder what usually has the President's attention as a hurricane approaches, it's clearing brush at his Texas farm.

Next - some young people in Vermont have begun making a "social statement" by going semi or totally naked in public. Now I have never been to Vermont, but I'm betting that the number of days when the temperature is suitable for being nude would be a small number. This story would really not have garnered my attention if it were not for the "interactive poll" which went with the story as published by the Boston Globe. The question??

Here ya go -- "Do you think nudity is a basic human right?"

The responses to this ridiculous question are fairly entertaining, true. But allow me to add a very serious note to the Boston Globe -- Under the clothes of every human on the planet, they are totally naked.

Perhaps the razor-sharp minds at the Globe could offer us some other must-read polls, like "Hands - Should They Be On The Ends of Your Arms?" (and a big thank you to Tits McGee for this link, and check out her new blog design too! She just always has the best dang links on the internets.)

An engineer friend of mine used to say that certain people were a "bubble left of plumb". A fine phrase indeed. He also used to say that he had days when he was "hip-deep in dumb." Having said that, the ramblings of Katherine Harris, as noted in a Knox Views post, indicate that dumb may have risen far above the hips and sits level at her lips:

Harris told the journalists "we have to have the faithful in government" because that is God's will. Separating religion and politics is "so wrong because God is the one who chooses our rulers," she said."

Or, as in the fiasco of election vote counts and recounts overseen by Harris in Florida in 2000, God needed the help of some hanging chads to accomplish His Will. Mysterious Ways indeed.

And last but certainly not least, how about the D.A.'s office in Colorado who solved the JonBenet case ... or, well, they didn't solve it, they ... well, they made a celebrity! Thankfully the new revised Cracked magazine got that John Mark Karr's confession. An unidentified member of the D.A.'s office remarked on the error, "Hey, he was using the whole 3-name deal, you know, like Lee Harvey Oswald, and all the bad ones use that t-name dealie." Here's an excerpt from the Cracked confession:

They did catch up with me in Bangkok and I was consulting with doctors about getting a sex change, so I think it’s pretty clear I’m crazy."


  1. You are the bee's knees, Joe Powell.

  2. i has cat's pajamas too!

  3. oooooooooo... whole lotta 'stupid' signs being handed out.. ;o)

  4. I'm so mad about Stephen losing to Manilow that my head might explode if I think too much about it. Come on, Manilow?? Arrrrrgh!

    That kiss was hot, though.

  5. james3:57 PM

    Robert Heinlin said " never underestimate the capacity for human stupidity "

  6. Stupid is as stupid does I guess. And if we just learn to tap into that stupidity we could use it as a sort of almanac. For example...

    See President Bush clearing brush at his Texas farm - batten down the hatches, a hurricane's a comin'!

    See President Bush stumbling to read a childrens book out loud to a group of elementary school kids - take the elevator down to the first floor and flee the building!

    (After 5 years is it still too soon to make jokes about that?)